Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Stinky Uncle Tucker COOPER

He's a dog.

No need to wipe your eyes and read that read it right the first time.

My new uncle is a dog!

My Gram has wanted a dog for what seems like for-ev-er. Grand-Dude was determined to obstruct every step of her plan to get one (I would like to believe it is because he has a stronger affection for cats--namely me, but I'm sure it has more to do with the dog turds strewn across the back yard).

"I can walk him," she said.

"You won't walk him," he said.

"I'll do 'Poop Alert' (our family's name for picking up turds before mowing the lawn)," said she.

"Riiiiiiight..." said he.

This battle has gone on for about two years. Finally, Grand-Dude conceded, claiming that he still didn't want the dog, but he loved Gram so much that, if a dog would make her happy, he would support it.


And, to add insult to injury, I've heard through the grapevine that Grand-Dude adores the new dog, calling him "Good Boy" and other sickening terms of endearment. Apparently, the dog follows him around and craves his attention more than Gram's (much to the delight of Grand-Dude).

So now I have a canine uncle. Tucker Cooper (they named him, but changed his name a week after he came to live with them because they couldn't remember "Tucker." Old people!!). He was found as a stray and rescued from the local pound, just hours before they were going to euthanize him. He was rescued by Noah Project and, after diligently searching for his original family, was placed for adoption.

So, I agree he is cute. And, I've heard he is gentle and kind. But, seriously...a DOG? I can't help but feel forsaken. Will Gram and Grand-Dude love him more than me? Will they not have time to cat-sit anymore? And, if they do cat-sit, will Tucker Cooper come with them?

Oh. My. Gawd. Will WE have to dog-sit for Tucker Cooper?

As a Drama Queen, I think I am obligated to faint now.


The Meezers said...

KUKKA! KUKKA! Wake up! Are you ok? I'm sure that Tucker will just fall in love wif you like all ofer creatures do. - Miles

William said...

Pictures of dogs are OK...I guess...but actual dogs, no. Sorry Kukka, I feel for you. You and Brach can come live with us if you need to.

Kukka-Maria said...

Squilliam, you are so sweet to offer up your home. I am pleased to report that this dog lives about 8 miles away from me, so I imagine I won't have to see him often.

At least I hope...

PrincessMia said...


that is a fantastic faint you just did. Well done.

Don't worry about the woofie. If he comes to visit, be prepared for the inevitable butt sniff. Dogs have weird ideas about what is an acceptable greeting.

George, Tipper, Max & Misty said...

Oh No! You're facing the same situation we deal with when our Sister B visits and her dogs Daisy & Shasta come with her. You must immediately prepare for Tuckers first visit (8 miles is NOTHING!) Dog proof your house...hide all your toys (especially feathers, Max says), put your food up where he can't eat it, block access to your bed with baby-gates, demand 24 hour notice of impending visits so you can prepare yourself. My Dear, heed my advice...I've been dealing with this for 9 YEARS!! Best of luck.


Gemini said...

My cousin is a chihuahua. She runs and runs and runs and I hide under the dresser where she can't to. I don't like being related to dogs and I'm sorry that you have that stain in your family too.

DEBRA said...


I feel for you I really do. I have an Aunt Annie...and she is a what is called a Jack why they call HER Jack I don't know because she's a she not a he. But she is a nuisance. I have to go hidey in the bedroom when she comes. ICK -- woofies.


Beau Beau & Angie said...

We feel for you Kukka. We shudder to fink what woulda happend if the beans broughted home a potcake from Turks & Caicos.

Scooby, Shaggy & Scout said...

Kukka love, that woofie is so small you could ride him. He could be your gallant steed. It must be instinct for them to suck up to the one in the family who is most reluctant. Grand dude is a soft touch! A marshmallow. Tucker has him in the palm of his paw. But you, dear, have your charms and you know how to use them!

Max said...

We used to have a dog. It's not so bad--you can blame things on the dog! Your Grand-dude is gonan find all kinds of stinky things to blame on him!

beingmccrary said...

When you DO have to interact with this dog...prepare to have your butt sniffed.

Les Trois Chats said...

Kukka -
Don't forget my recent report - if you notice anything unusual about this so-called "Tucker" (and frankly, what's NOT unusual about a dog??) - please notify the FBI (Feline Bureau of Investigation) immediately! It's your duty, Empress, family or not. He does look pretty harmless, though... and rideable, as SS&S suggested... but be careful.
~ turtle
ps (what a lovely faint, btw. Nala and I may have to come over for lessons!)