Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Kukka's Prison Break?!

I hate posting twice on the same day, but this was too important to wait. Kukka's well-being is at stake!

Because Mom spent most of this morning trying to clean the schmutz off of her silk lampshade in the bedroom--courtesy of Empress Kukka-Maria's licking tongue, she has changed her mind about posting bail for Kukka today. I am organizing a picket line at the courthouse. Anyone wanting to make a poster and march on Kukka's behalf is welcome to join the following, who have already committed:
  • Me
  • Brad Pitt & Angelina Jolie (not just because of Brad and Kukka's previous love affair, but because they are always wanting to help the "under-dog"--or in this case, "under-cat")
  • Barbara Walters (she is going to flip the bird to the police)
  • Oprah (she and Kukka have reconciled)
  • Jerry Springer (who is just showing up to kiss up to Kukka because he wants her to re-enact the entire ordeal--with Star--on his show)
  • Nicole Richie and Paris Hilton (who have decided to put their bad blood behind them for a day to show their support for The Empress)
  • Adrian Brody (because he is now, officially, my mom's secret boyfriend--so secret he doesn't know about it)
  • Katie Holmes (because she feels badly about Tom's behavior at the party)
  • Suri Cruise...wait, no. Apparently, she is not doing public appearances at this time.
  • Brooke Shields (because she and Kukka are friends and she heard about Tom's outburst at the party, so wants to "stick it to him!")
  • Rosie O'Donnell (because of her pure hate for Star Jones-Reynolds)
  • Al Reynolds (because he is hoping The Whole Enchilada will show up)
  • Miles Meezer (valued member of Kukka's Tomcat Stable...who is also bringing brother Sammy and Gramma Trixie. Let's just she doesn't break a hip waving a picket sign!)
  • Gemini and sister Cheysuli (who is running for president, so supporting Kukka will show potential constituents that she is soft-hearted. She is also contacting various senators to solicit support)
  • Scooby, Shaggy and Scout (who are bringing their neighborhood gang of rough-n-tough cats: Soni, Cheotee, Patches, Bridget and the super tough tomcat Tiger)
  • Princess Mia (a fellow royal, who has always been such a devout Kukka supporter)
  • Diva Kitty and her gang (including Xavier--the newest Tomcat Stable dude and a gaggle of bunnies)
  • George, Tipper, Max and Misty (which is so cool, since they have been pretty pre-occupied with bathing...or giving a shower of some sort to their human sister for her upcoming wedding)
  • Zeus (who made some of his own posters and, with his strong hand and maturity, is sure to keep all protesters in line and all police at bay)
  • Skeezix (the cross-eyed feline royal who is unconventionally beautiful and is sure to draw media attention)
  • Moosey (one of the first, and I believe youngest, member of the Tomcat Stable. He can whip his floofy tail at the cops to keep them from arresting protesters. Plus, if Nala and Turtle come, things will go down! They are skilled in combat maneuvers--living with Moose, you have to!)
  • Emma and her crew (Um...I hate to be the one to bring this up, but Emma lives with a dog! I hope that dog won't try to eat any protesters--tasty or not!)
  • Cal the Wonderdog (representin' the barkers, Cal is sure to help keep the peace. Plus, as a Collie, people will look at him and say, "Oh, loooooook! It's Laaaaassie!" That kind of distraction can be useful for the rest of us--as long as Cal can endure that mistaken identity crap)
  • Deb and her gaggle of pets (in this case, "gaggle" specifically refers to the FKA (Felines Known As) Seaborne, Sam, Summer, Spats & Sassy. Someone loves alliteration almost as much as I do!)
  • Abby the Manx and her posse: Boo, Jinx, Ping & Gracie (Tail or no tail, I hear Abby is fierce and has great endurance, which is critical when picketing)
  • More to be named later--as they volunteer.

I made a poster for the occasion. I hope it sends a strong message to the authorities!


The Meezers said...

OOOOOOO!! ME ME ME!!! I will join the protest! - Miles

The Meezers said...

Blogger won't let me post my poster, but I maded one! And I'm gonna march around the living room wif it. - Miles

Brach said...

UGH! That Dread Pirate Blogger ruins all of our fun!

I'm adding you to the list, Miles. She will appreciate knowing you are out there shouting and marching on her behalf!

Gemini said...

I will be there!

Cheysuli said...

I have called my senators and they await finding out who your senator is, Brach so that they can call about Kukka-Maria.

I will be there to help out shortly and I am bringing the Newmans as well, as they are quite supportive.

Cheysuli said...

Ah, I just looked at your blog, Michigan. The phone call should be quick!

Scooby, Shaggy & Scout said...

We're coming and are rounding up our neighborhood cats too...Soni, Cheotee, Patches, Bridget and the super tough tomcat Tiger! Power to the Paws!

PrincessMia said...

I'm in! Anything for my sisfur!

Diva Kitty said...

All six of us are coming in support! T-Bun (aka Orlando) is ready to thump anyone who disses' the Kukka.

George, Tipper, Max & Misty said...

We'll be there (Misty, too)! Brach, do you think Finnegan J. Katz, Esq (cat attorney) should be hired to represent Kukka? Also, did you know Fat Eddy in Canada has become a cat detective. Our poor Kukka needs all the help she can get.

Zeus said...

I'll be there. I made my own signs as well.

Skeeeeezix the Cat said...

Wow, that's a nice sine. I will be happy to join the protest as long as I can ware my tiara, and as long as it's not too hot, becuz I am tired of it being hot.

Diva Kitty said...

Sisfurrr when you get out of the slammer there is a meme for you to make your Depp Slave complete.

Les Trois Chats said...

I will, of course, be on hand to picket for and rescue (if possible) my beautiful Kukka. (I'm so glad you liked the HK bauble from Neimans - did you notice that those jewels are PAVE diamonds? Turtle assured me that they are sought after by royalty such as your gorgeous self. Only the best for my lovely Empress...)

And don't worry, we'll free you!!!
~ moose

Emma's Kat said...

You can count Emma and her crew in! Free Kukka now!!

Cal the Wonderdog said...

Ok, I'm in too. And sometimes you have to set yourself free if you know what I mean K!


The Taylor CatSSSSS said...

Count me in & my five cats: Seaborne, Sam, Summer, Spats & Sassy. FREE KUKKA NOW! FREE KUKKA NOW!

or the felines of the world will start a revolution!

DEBRA said...

FREE Kukka! FREE Kukka!!

WE have posted your banner over at our place...



The Meezers said...

I talkded Sammy and Trixie into joining the protest too! YAY. - Miles