She found the pattern online.
She knitted it.
I thought she was delusional and it was just a sorry attempt at a lame joke.
Last night, she unveiled what she is now calling a "masterpiece."
I am pretty sure she is not using that word correctly.
She said she had to cut the ruffle short because her circular needles were not long enough to take another 100% increase in stitches (whatever).
She, like the pattern creator, had to add a ribbon to the top to secure it under my arms (bitch).
She said she chose purple because it is the traditional color of royalty (gag).
While she enjoyed the final product tremendously (and appreciated the aerobic work-out she received while wrestling me into it), she'd promised she'd never put it on me again because she loves and respects me.
Despite my best judgment, I think I may keep her around for a little while longer...