Friday, March 30, 2007

EBAY AUCTION: Win the
ULTIMATE KUKKA-MARIA EXPERIENCE!

  • You've always wanted to be her...impossible.


  • You've always desired to rub shoulders with celebrities...highly unlikely, as you're not famous.


  • You've always secretly desired paparazzi attention...not gonna happen.

While you CAN NOT BECOME The Empress, now, you can spend some quality time with her and get a glimpse into a typical day of a celebrity blogging feline!


BID ON THE ULTIMATE KUKKA-MARIA EXPERIENCE!


Rules:
  1. Bidding closes at 11:59 PM EDT on Sun, April 1.


  2. You may bid in the comments.


  3. Bidding can only increase by no more than $10 increments to keep it competitive. For example: If the current bid it $100 (riiiight, as if), you may bid $110. If you can not do math, I am not sure I want to spend the day with you anyway. I need someone to keep track of my treat calories!


  4. Only actual numbers will be accepted; we'll have no "I bid a squillion dollars!"


  5. You may bid as often as you like.


  6. Trash-talking to and intimidation of other bidders is not only encouraged, it may be required to win! Please refrain from bitter name-calling. I'm the only one who does that on this site.


  7. Once bidding begins, the "Buy it Now" option is no longer valid.


  8. Any questions about the auction or bidding should be directed to the comments section of this post and will be answered as quickly as possible.


  9. The recap of Kukka's day with the winner will be posted on Monday, April 2. (Before you say it, I know that the time between the end of bidding and the time the post goes up is less than 24 hours. THIS IS IMAGINARY, PEOPLE!)


  10. AMMENDMENT: We do accept PayPal to collect fake money from you.


The day will include, but not be limited to: Interaction with celebrities, 2-3 naps, morning and afternoon tongue baths, unleashing verbal abuse to the paparazzi and knocking over my Agent's shit in the house!


Bid early! Bid often!


Click the actual ebay listing below for the starting bid and other auction details:

29 comments:

Brach said...

I start the bidding at $1,000 (and not a penny more)!

You're super-sexy and highly-foxy, but I KNOW what a day with you is like...

Kaze, Latte, or Chase said...

I'd like to bid $1,500.00. I think I can snag the Woman's Paypal account. You do accept Paypal, right?

Chase

Kukka-Maria said...

ATTENTION BIDDER: CHASE

YOUR BID HAS BEEN OFFICIALLY CHANGED TO $1,010. (SEE RULE #3).

And, yes. We DO take PayPal for to acquire fake money. ;)

Mouse said...

$1,510.00, if only because my kittie Nuala could learn a thing or two from Kukka!!!

If it's all right with her majesty Kukka-Marie, I have tagged you. The details of the tag are on my blog. If you have already done this tag, that's okay. If you do not want to do this tag, that's okay, too. And if I'm not supposed to tag you, then I accept all the scratches that may come my way. Thank you.

Kukka-Maria said...

FINE, PEOPLE! HAHAHA! I am now honoring Mouse's $1,510.00 bid, because it WAS in a $10 increment (even though it was based on Chased original bid that was reduced).

Clearly you people want to pay more than what I'm asking.

RULE #3 STANDS: BIDDING MUST BE MADE IN $10 INCREMENTS TO KEEP THINGS COMPETITIVE.

CURRENT BID: $1,510.00. To Mousey!

Lady Jane Scarlett said...

A googol ten. And, yes empress, a googol is a real number...

Kukka-Maria said...

Et tu, Lady Jane? Of course googol is a number...but it is FAR GREATER than $10 above $1,510.00.

I'll save you some cash and accept a lower bid for $1,520.00.

I can see this auction is going to be labor-intensive for The Empress. Ick.

CURRENT BID: $1,520.00 to Lady Jane.

Fluffy said...

I can't wait.
$1,530.00

Anonymous said...

test

Renee said...

Lemme get this straight...You're making US pay to Cat Sit you?

let me think about this. I know that Darly would love it, but I don't think she should be around somecat like you. You're way above PG13

Furry Logic said...

$15.40!

What?

Oh! $1,540? That is alot even in imaginary money!

Derby said...

I can't afford you Kukka! Not even with mum's Corporate Card.

The Meezers said...

1550 - i saw mom's bank balance, it saided 25.60 so I can pay lots more if the bidding goes up. I don't care about commas or dots. I just want a day wif Kukka. - Miles

Karen Jo said...

You are way out of my league, Empress, but as this is imaginary money, I can go to $1560. I use imaginary PayPal to pay, right?

The Meezers said...

oh oh oh, 1570!!! Keep it coming, mom's got lots more fake money! I fink she prints her own. - Miles

Anonymous said...

Come on all you Tomcat Stable members. Bidding time! Only Miles is bidding so far.

Kukka-Maria said...

I always sort of suspected Miles loved me more than the rest.

*Sigh...*

Zeus said...

Stumbles in with a massive hangover from Friday night partying with bills flapping in the wind...

Who loves ya baby? $1580 from me: The all-powerful, all-drunk Zeus! Woohoo!

Shell Tolliver said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lilo, Stitch & Nani said...

Kukka - me & my two awesomely fabulous sisters are interested in a foxy, furry day with you! While we may not be as amazingly sexy as you, we also have multiple nips & are open minded! (yes - we watch our pet humans you know!)We'll even bring over our favorite mice to play around with (Stitch might share a milk ring too)
$1590 from Lilo, Stitch & Nani

Teena said...

How much is than in Canadian Tire money?!?!

Pink Chihuahua Princess said...

Kukka--since my fluffy, long haired sister is a lawyer and I have a successful wedding planning business I know that Tzeitel and I could definitely win this bid. But, as we are still upset that you made fun of Dr. Phil's Southern accent we will not be giving you our money.

Too bad for you too, because everyone knows that I am not just a regular wedding planner, but I only do the weddings of the rich and famous. Barks, ya'll--Belicia.

Kim and Oscar said...

Since it's pretend paypal money, I will go up to $1600. And, I have 2 pet rats to throw into the mix. I'm a handsome Ginger boy with experience, I'm 9!

K T Cat said...

Looking into the collection plate from this Sunday, the Feline Theocracy bids $1610!

K T Cat said...

I bid $1630! Ha ha!

the bigger, hunkier, 43 yr old who is not brad pitt said...

Of course southern people sound stoopid that's why they talk so slow... why would anyone want to spend time with a chihuahua at all and more specifically a pink one?

I was going to bid but I'm intimidated by your supernumary nipples and afraid that you'll require me to service them in some way.

Carmen said...

$1640 from me, for just the naps alone. What I wouldn't give for a good nap, and especially one with you, Kukka. We could say we "slept" together. ha ha.

Kim and Oscar said...

I should have stayed up! I could have won this auction!

The Meezers said...

oh man, I missed out on winning. WAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
::wipes tears away with paw:: I hopes that you has a great time wif Carmen. ::sob sob:: - Miles