Thursday, May 24, 2007

What's That Again?


I just found out I didn't win American Idol! What the...HUH?!

I didn't even post yesterday because I was leading a letter-writing campaign to vote for myself. Granted, the participants in the campaign were few: Brad Pitt, My Agent, Brach (who kept falling asleep) and that bitch-face, Oprah (who kept saying she thought my name was spelled "J...O...R...D...I...N...").

Now, this morning, I find out they were only accepting votes via the telephone. What gives, American Idol? Have you no respect for the art of long-hand letter writing?

Asses.

Clearly this competition was not based on foxiness, super-sexiness or multiple nipples. I resent the fact I was robbed of my just recognition as the idol of all peoples American (including, of course, those of the Central and Southern variety).

I declare a secret fight on Simon Cowell, Randy Jackson (what up, dawg), Ryan Seacrest, and Paula Abdul.

By the way, Paula, if you wanted a nose job you didn't have to pretend to "break" it so you could justify going under the knife. Plus, you don't seem to need an excuse to be hopped up on pain killers.

I'm just sayin'.

12 comments:

The Meezers said...

i thought it was odd too that there was no dial in number for you.

Kukka, it's my daddy coming to visit for the weekend!!

Kukka-Maria said...

Well, that's good. I just had a manicure and I didn't want to have to scratch a rival cat's eyes out for moving in on one of my men!

The Crew said...

What's the matter with those people, don't they recognize talent like yours when they see it!?

They all deserve to be in a secret fight with you and be demoted to the "D" list. What...you say they're already on the "D" list? Well then, make that the "E, F or G" list.

And, as for former BFF Paula Abdul, your nose is much better than hers.

mcabty said...

I absolutely looove that pic of you Kukka, you sexy beast! I'm going to have it blown up poster-size and put it on my bedroom wall. You should consider selling copies.

William said...

You're still our American Idol, Kukka.

NOLADawn said...

You were robbed!!

Cheysuli said...

I thought you were a judge, Kukka? Really you were competing?

Pink Chihuahua Princess said...

We're on your side for the secret fight, Kukka. Woof!

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Kimo & Sabi said...

Hmmm... we don't get it either! You certainly have da stage presence!

Karen Jo said...

That just goes to show that the whole thing must be rigged. You were obviously the most talented creature in the competition. On with the secret fight!

Renee said...

I know you're not much into children/kittens... but I thought you might find this interesting

http://lillyput.blogspot.com/2007/05/guest-blogger-today.html